


Hush, Hush

by auroradawn9669



Series: Cry Little Sister [4]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Blowjobs, Bullying, Dark Billy Hargrove, Domestic Violence, Emotional Abuse, F/M, Gunplay, Homophobia, Humiliation, Hurt Max, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Sexual Abuse, Intimidation, Lucas is a great boyfriend, Misogyny, Non-Consensual flogging, Obsessive Billy Hargrove, Physical Abuse, Possessive Billy Hargrove, Racism, Seriously he has no redeemable qualities in this series, Sex between Minors, Sibling Abuse, Verbal Abuse, Victim Blaming, not safe sane or consensual, power and control
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-11
Updated: 2018-04-11
Packaged: 2019-04-21 10:42:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14283195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/auroradawn9669/pseuds/auroradawn9669
Summary: Max had known she was in trouble the moment she’d grabbed Billy’s arm that afternoon and pulled him away from Mike. She didn’t know exactly what Billy was going to do to her this weekend, but she knew it was going to be bad. When she climbed into the camaro with him after school and he didn’t say a word, she knew she was right. However scary he might be when he was screaming in her face, the silence was somehow worse.





	Hush, Hush

**Author's Note:**

> This turned out to be WAY longer than anticipated but here it is. Please heed the warnings.

Max stood in her bedroom, wrapped up in her blue robe, hair dripping wet from the shower, and stared at the clothes piled on her bed the following Monday morning. Skirts, scoop neck blouses and sweaters she would never have picked out for herself, and three pairs of dress shoes - black, navy blue, and brown. There was also a pile of jewelry she’d never seen before. 

“Welcome to your new wardrobe, Max.” 

She turned to see Billy leaning against the doorframe of her room, and she tensed. “You’re kidding, right?” She knew he wasn’t even as she asked, because hadn’t he told her a week ago that he was going to start picking out her clothes? 

He took a long drag off his cigarette. “You can pick what you want from there and if I don’t like it, you can change after breakfast.” 

“People are going to ask questions. I would never wear any of this,” she pointed out. “My friends know me better than that.” 

Billy arched his eyebrows. “Tell them your bitch mom wanted you to start looking like a girl for a change.” He smirked. 

Max’s hands curled into fists at her sides and she turned to stare at the pile of clothes once more. “Where did all this come from anyway?” There was no way he could afford to buy all of this. Unless he’d robbed a bank, which wouldn’t really surprise her.

“Tommy’s girlfriend Carol,” he answered, voice casual. “I told her my sister was tired of looking like a homeless dyke and she was more than happy to offer up her daddy’s credit card to help you out.” 

She closed her eyes for a moment, wondering, not for the first time, how this had become her life. 

“Better pick something. Clock’s ticking.” He watched her intently. “Or I could just pick something for you.” 

“I can pick out my own clothes.” She reluctantly began looking through the piles of shirts until she found one she didn’t hate as much as the rest - a dark blue sweater that was just slightly lower cut than she would have liked. She set it aside and glared down at the pile of skirts. 

She hadn’t worn a skirt or a dress voluntarily since she was about six, for Easter sunday. It had been a frilly pink monstrosity that she’d _hated_. She’d gone outside to play with some boys from church and had gotten all muddy and ruined the dress. Her mom had cried but she’d never made her wear another again. 

“This one.” He reached around her, picking up a knee-length pleated blue jean skirt and tossing it over to land atop the sweater. 

“Fine.” It wasn’t like it really mattered. 

Billy wrapped his arms around her from behind, pulling her back against him and resting his chin on her shoulder. “Want some help getting dressed?” he murmured, breath hot against her ear. His hands rested just above the sash that held her robe together in the front.

It was all she could do not to pull away from him, barely able to suppress a shudder. “I think I can handle it,” she said, voice flat. 

He chuckled low, pressing a kiss to the side of her neck before pulling away and waving a hand at her. “Go ahead.” 

She could taste bile in the back of her throat, knowing there was no point in arguing with him. She reluctantly untied the sash of her robe as he watched with interest and she did her best to ignore him, reaching for her bra before sliding the robe off her shoulders and letting it drop to the floor. She quickly slid the bra on and reached for the sweater, tugging it on over her head, anxious to get dressed. To cover herself under the weight of his stare. 

She stepped into the skirt just as quickly, zipping it up and feeling somehow almost as exposed as she had been when she’d shed the robe. 

“Turn around so I can see,” he instructed and she reluctantly turned to face him, watching his eyes narrow a little as he took in her appearance. “Needs something.” He moved closer and she stepped away involuntarily but thankfully he didn’t seem to notice. He combed through the jewelry, pulling out a necklace and holding it up. “Turn around.” He twirled his finger and she did as told, closing her eyes. 

Billy pressed the choker against her neck, stroking her skin lightly as he moved to fasten the clasp. “There we go.” He turned her so they were facing the mirror on her door and licked his lips as he met her eyes in the mirror. “Perfect.” 

Max said nothing, body tense as he slid his hands down over her sweater, squeezing her breasts lightly and then letting her go, smacking her ass before heading for the door. “Put on some shoes and get your ass out here. Almost time to go.” 

She watched him vanish down the hall as she stared at her reflection. She looked like a creepy barbie version of herself and she had no doubt that her friends were going to piss themselves laughing. 

Today was going to suck so much. 

***

“I’m telling you. There’s no way any of you can beat me. I practiced all weekend,” Mike said matter-of-factly as he looked around at his friends as they gathered around the bike rack in front of the high school.

Lucas arched his eyebrows, nonplussed by his argument. “Pretty sure one of us can.” In fact, he was positive. It didn’t matter what the game was, Max was going to be the best at it. It was a conclusion he’d come to very early on in their relationship, and it’s one that all of them had accepted _except_ Mike. 

“She’s never even played Mario Brothers yet,” he defended, shaking his head.

Dustin smirked. “Dude, that doesn’t matter. She’s _Mad Max_. She’s gonna kick your ass even if you spend _weeks_ practicing.” He chuckled.

Eleven patted Mike’s arm in what Lucas assumed she considered a reassuring gesture, but it just made Lucas’ smirk broaden. “Yeah well --” Mike’s protests trailed off and he stared at something across the parking lot. “Holy _shit._ ” 

Will looked at him, confused. “What?” 

“Mike? What’s so…” Lucas’ own voice trailed off as he spotted what had made Mike’s jaw drop. Max was approaching. 

And she was wearing a _skirt._

“Holy shit,” Dustin echoed, his eyes wide with shock. “Did hell freeze over?” 

Will smacked his arm, but he was just as wide-eyed as the rest of them. 

“What’s wrong?” Eleven looked around at all of them and then at Max, utterly confused. 

“She’s in a _skirt_ ,” Mike explained quietly, turning his gaze to his girlfriend. If anything, that just made her look even more puzzled. 

“So?” 

Will didn’t quite manage a smile. “Max doesn’t wear skirts.” 

“I guess she does _now_ ,” Dustin responded, still gawking. 

The redhead in question looked more than a little unhappy as she approached and Lucas stepped away from the rest of the party, making his way toward her. “Hey.” 

“Don’t talk about it,” she mumbled, not bothering to stop to greet the rest of them, holding onto her backpack tightly, skateboard nowhere in sight as she made a beeline for the school entrance.

He looked back at the rest of their friends, but followed her into the building and down the hall toward her locker. “What’s going on?” he whispered as she spun the combination on her lock. 

She didn’t answer right away, and she didn’t look at him. “My mom apparently decided it was time for me to start dressing like a _girl._ ” 

“She’s making you wear dresses?” His eyebrows furrowed and he wondered what had brought this on so suddenly. Granted, he’d never met her mom, but Max had made it seem like her mother had given up on Max being girly years ago. 

“Lucky me.” Lucas stared at her for a moment, then reached out and put a hand on her arm. She finally looked at him and her eyes were shiny with unshed tears. “I feel like an idiot.” 

He shook his head, then reached out and tugged her into his arms. “If it makes you feel any better, Mike got a Nintendo over the weekend and he honestly thinks he has a shot at kicking your ass at Super Mario Brothers because he spent the weekend practicing.” 

A short laugh escaped her and he grinned before pulling away to look at her again. “I guess I’m going to have to prove him wrong.” 

“Hell yeah,” he agreed, pleased he’d made her laugh when she’d been miserable.

Max drew in a breath, squaring her shoulders. “Come on. Let’s get to class.” 

***

“She looks fantastic.” 

Billy tore his gaze away from Max that afternoon, looking at Carol and Tommy, who were also watching the redhead across the cafeteria. 

“You did a good job of picking shit out for her,” he said with a shrug, looking back at his step sister, watching her pick at the meatloaf on her tray. 

“I have good taste,” she bragged, popping a grape into her mouth and smirking. 

“She’s got great legs,” Tommy commented, grinning when Carol slugged him across the chest. 

“She skateboards,” Billy responded shortly, cutting a look at his friend that wasn’t overly friendly. 

Tommy sobered at that. “Right, sorry. Almost forgot she’s your sister.” 

“ _Step_ sister,” he corrected automatically, turning his gaze to Max and watching as she rose to her feet, heading away from the table and dumping the rest of her lunch in the garbage. His gaze dropped to her legs. 

Tommy had a point. She had a _great_ set of legs and they led straight up to a perfect ass that he loved getting his hands on. 

Billy licked his lips. He could hardly wait to get her alone later.

***

“Did you _see_ Billy’s little sister?” 

Max froze in the bathroom stall at the sound of an unfamiliar voice out by the row of sinks. 

“I would have bet money she was butch,” said another unknown voice, laughing. 

“I still bet she is.” 

“I don’t know. I thought she was dating that black kid. Lyle Sinclair or something? Can I borrow your hairspray?” 

“Sure.” Max could hear the sound of an aerosol can was sprayed, nose crinkling at the smell.

“Lucas,” another voice corrected, softly. This one was familiar but Max couldn’t place the voice right away. “His name is Lucas. And some girls just prefer wearing pants. It doesn’t mean they’re lesbians.” 

There was a moment of silence and Max’s eyebrows furrowed. 

“Sorry, Marie. We forgot about your...thing for him.” 

Marie. Marie Farrington. They had seventh period together. The girl was quiet, nice. She was also really pretty. She had a thing for Lucas? 

“He’s a nice guy. That’s all. He’s super smart.” 

“We know,” the first girl said with a sigh as her footsteps headed for the door, followed by the others. 

Max stood silently, frozen in place until the bathroom went totally silent. She flushed the toilet and emerged from the stall to wash her hands, not sure what to make out of what she’d just overheard.

***

“I still can’t believe you’re in a dress.” 

Max looked over to where Mike had taken the seat beside her in sixth hour study hall. She scowled at him, narrowing her eyes. “Wheeler, if you don’t watch it, you’ll be in a dress next,” she warned. 

He grinned at her and sat forward in his chair as he got his book out. “Who knew you were an actual girl.” 

Her jaw tightened and she leaned back, folding her arms across her chest. Mike had long since accepted her into the party, and the nature of their relationship had always been somewhat more based on merciless teasing than her relationships with the other guys, but right now she wasn’t in the mood to be antagonized. “I’m going to kick your ass at Mario Brothers, by the way,” she informed him, no hint of kidding in her tone. 

“Yeah, we’ll see. You don’t even _have_ a Nintendo,” he pointed out. 

She turned her head to glare at him. “Yeah, sorry that my family’s not rich like yours.” 

Mike stared at her, eyes going slightly wide as he apparently realized he’d crossed a line he shouldn’t have. “Max, that’s not what --” 

“Just do your homework and leave me alone,” she snapped, grabbing her backpack off the floor and rising to her feet. 

“Ms. Mayfield, are you going somewhere?” Mrs. Martin asked, arching her eyebrows. 

“Yeah. Across the room,” she responded, dropping into a seat as far away from Mike Wheeler as she could get. She spent the entire hour ignoring the guilty looks he kept sending her direction. She wasn’t in the mood to deal with it. And when the class was over, she didn’t give him a chance to catch up with her. 

True to her nickname, she was up and out of there before the bell even had a chance to finish ringing.

***

Seventh period found her staring contemplatively at the petite blonde two rows away from her. Fortunately for Max, the other girl didn’t seem to notice her complete lack of manners and for that, she was grateful. She did, however, notice the girl looking over at Lucas every couple of moments and a deep, unsettled feeling wormed its way into her chest.

Max shifted her gaze to her boyfriend, wondering, distantly, if he’d ever looked at Marie the same way she looked at him. She shifted in her seat, raking a hand through her hair and then looking at the other girl once more. She was _really_ pretty, her hair long and gloriously straight, her eyes a piercing green. She was on the volleyball team, Max knew. Made good grades. Was _great_ at science, like the boys all were. Her lips were a pale pink thanks to whatever shade of lipstick she wore. 

She was any typical boy’s walking wet dream. 

She tapped her pencil on her book absently until Lucas looked over at her, eyebrows furrowed. She forced a smile, and ducked her head, red hair curtaining her face from view, thankfully, since her cheeks had definitely grown warm. 

She wondered if Marie’s life was half as normal as Lucas’. Other dimensions and demogorgons aside, Lucas’ family was the most stable, normal family she’d ever met. The Wheeler’s fought all the time, Dustin’s mom was...eccentric. The Byers’ were nice, but all things considered, they weren’t exactly a _normal_ family. And then there was Jane - El to the party - except for Max. She’d never tried calling her that since the first time she’d met the girl. Jane’s life was anything but normal, even now. 

And her own? Jesus Christ. They were so far from normal it was laughable. 

Yeah. Marie’s family was probably normal, like Lucas’. She probably got to go home every night to a nice family dinner, and her parents were probably _fantastic_. Her siblings - if she had any - were probably just as fucking perfect. They probably all got along swell, and nothing bad ever happened to any of them. 

Max forced herself to take a deep breath as she felt her heart start to beat faster in her chest when she glanced at the clock on the wall. Fifteen minutes until the end of school. Until it was time to go home with Billy, be there alone at his mercy until her mom or step-dad got home from work in a couple more hours. 

She swallowed, gripping onto her pencil so tightly it snapped in half loudly and the classroom grew silent. Her face flushed as several students and Mr. Parson turned to stare at her. “Ms. Mayfield? Are you all right?” 

“My pencil broke,” she said dumbly. 

“I see that,” he responded, unimpressed. 

She ducked her head once more, closing her eyes and willing herself to stop freaking out. There was nothing she could do to avoid what was coming anyway. 

Max could feel Lucas’ concerned eyes focused on her and she did her best not to look at him. If she looked at him right now, she wasn’t sure what she would say or do, but it wouldn’t be anything _good._

Unable to stop herself, she looked across the row again and to her surprise, she found Marie staring back at her, a tiny worried frown on her face. 

Fucking great. 

Pity from her competition. That was exactly what she needed to top off this shitty day. She looked back at her with a blank expression, jaw tightening. 

She didn’t need Marie’s sympathy. 

She didn’t need _anyone’s_ sympathy. 

After class, she wanted nothing more than to just take off before Lucas had a chance to catch her, but she couldn’t do that. Not to him. She remained sitting after the bell rang, indicating that it was time to go home. 

Lucas didn’t make any move to get up either, lingering behind even as everyone else, including Mr. Parson filed out quickly. She could feel his gaze on her and she exhaled slowly, turning her head to look at him. 

“Max?” he finally prompted quietly. “What’s going on?” 

Her throat ached with the urge to tell him the truth. To beg him to help her figure a way out of everything that was happening with Billy. Lucas was a planner. More than that, he was _smart_. He might be the smartest person she’d ever met. If _anyone_ could figure out a solution to her predicament, it was him. But telling would mean putting him in danger, and it would also involve...telling him. 

The idea of telling him what had been happening, what Billy had been doing to her, forcing _her_ to do. What would he think of her then? How could he know all of that and not look at her differently?

She suddenly felt sick to her stomach. 

“Just...it’s been a really shitty day,” she told him, looking back down at her desk.  


He scooted his desk over so it was closer to hers and he reached out, resting a hand on her shoulder. “Because of the skirt?” he asked hesitantly. 

It wasn’t even the skirt itself that was getting to her. It was what it meant: that Billy now had almost full control over _every_ aspect of her life. That she wasn’t even allowed to pick out her own clothes anymore. She gave a slight shrug, biting down hard on her tongue because she was afraid of what words might tumble out of her mouth without her consent. 

“People have been staring at me all day,” she mumbled. That part was true. She’d seen people do doubletakes every time she walked down the hallway, guys and girls alike gawking at her like she was some kind of circus freak. It was how she _felt_ , even if she didn’t care that much about what they thought of her. 

“Yeah, me included, but that’s kind of an everyday thing.” His voice was gentle, teasing and she cast a glance at him from the corner of her eye. 

“So smooth,” she responded, one corner of her mouth turning up. 

“My middle name,” he joked, watching her intently. 

Max exhaled. “I fought with Mike,” she admitted. She pressed her lips together and looked at him, meeting his eyes. Lucas seemed surprised by that and she got it. She and Mike teased each other all the time, but it rarely ever escalated into anything serious these days. 

“About what?” 

“Just...stupid shit.” 

“Did he say something to you about the skirt thing?” 

She closed her eyes. “I just wasn’t in the mood for the usual.” Which wasn’t Mike’s fault, but some part of her wished that Mike knew her well enough to know when he needed to back off, the way the other guys did. The way _Lucas_ always did. 

“He’ll get over it,” Lucas said gently. “Don’t stress, okay?” He leaned in and kissed her temple, draping his arm around her. “Come on. Let’s get out of here. Hit the arcade?” he suggested. 

The idea of defying Billy, of taking off with Lucas after school held its own appeal, but she knew that the punishment wouldn’t be aimed at just her this time if she did. He’d go after Lucas just to prove a point. God she hated her life. 

“Actually...I think I want to go home and take a nap. I didn’t really sleep that well last night,” she told him, chewing her lower lip before she turned her head to look at him. “Tomorrow?” She hoped that was something she could work out with Billy. It wasn’t like he could keep her from her friends around the clock. Not without raising a lot of suspicion. 

“Tomorrow’s fine,” he agreed, nodding. “Escort a lady to her locker?” 

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t start calling me a lady just because I’m in a skirt, Stalker,” she warned, gathering her things up and rising to her feet.

He grinned.

***

Billy watched from the driver’s seat of his car as Max exited the school alongside Lucas Sinclair and the rest of their loser friends. It was odd not seeing her with her skateboard, but it wouldn’t be practical to have when she was wearing a skirt. 

He stared intently at her as she told her friends goodbye and parted ways with them, pleased that Lucas hadn’t touched her. The thought of him putting his hands on Max made him want to pummel the kid’s face in. No. Not just pummel his face in. He wanted to do a lot worse than that. But that would have to wait. Part of what was making this work as well as it was, was because it gave him a heavy amount of leverage over his little step-sister. If he did away with Sinclair too soon, this would all backfire. 

He noticed the way Max didn’t look at him as she approached the car. She kept her head down, something she never used to do, even before the bat incident. He smirked as he turned so he could watch her climb into the passenger seat, eyes lingering on her long, bare legs. “Max,” he greeted, dragging his gaze up to look at her face. 

He shifted the car into gear, peeling out of the parking lot and whipping it down the street. Once they were securely on the road, he cut his eyes over to her again. “What’d your friends think about your new look?” he asked idly. 

She was silent for a moment. “That I was replaced by a pod person,” she responded dully, staring out the passenger side window. 

Billy grinned at that, reaching out and resting a hand on her thigh, feeling her tense beneath his hand. “They’ll get used to it. So will you.” 

“I want to go to the arcade tomorrow after school.” 

He arched an eyebrow. “What’s in it for me?” 

“If you make me change everything all at one time, people are going to get suspicious, Billy.”

He tilted his head, thinking about that as he drove, staring out the windshield at the road ahead. She was right about that. He couldn’t afford anyone finding out about the little deal that lie between them. That didn’t mean he couldn’t use that deal in his favor, though. “Okay. So what are you willing to do? There’s gotta be a little give and take here, Max. I keep giving and giving and you keep taking and taking.” He grinned when he saw the way her jaw tightened slightly. “What are you willing to give?” 

“What do you _want?_ ” The words were just this side of snippy and that just wouldn’t do. He tightened his hand on her thigh. 

“Make me an offer,” he told her, voice growing serious. 

Max was silent for several long moments as she presumably weighed all the options in her mind, trying to come up with one she could live with. After another moment, he raised his eyebrows when her hand moved to rest on the bulge between his legs. He turned his head to look at her, meeting her eyes for the briefest of moments before her own gaze dropped, her cheeks red. 

“Ask me,” he murmured, tracing circles with his thumb over her thigh. 

“If I get you off, can I please go to the arcade tomorrow?” 

Billy smirked.

***

The week passed all too quickly for Max’s liking. She used to look forward to weekends, but now she dreaded them because it meant more time at home, more time around Billy. Thursday night she lay awake for hours, dreading this weekend in particular because her mom and Neil were going to some event in Indianapolis and would be gone until Saturday afternoon. 

She didn’t fall asleep until sometime after 1, and she was awakened a short time later by the sound of breaking glass. She shot straight up in bed, clutching a pillow tightly to her chest, heart pounding. 

She could hear the sounds of arguing down the hall and it only took her a moment to realize it was Neil and Billy rather than Neil and her mom. 

Their voices were muffled at first, but they became more clear as footsteps stomped down the hall toward Billy’s room across the hall. She squeezed her eyes shut tightly at the sound of flesh striking flesh.

“Fucking piece of _shit_ faggot!” Neil screamed. This time the sound was harsher, more familiar: leather against skin. Billy didn’t make a sound, and even though she couldn’t see what was happening, she _knew_ exactly what the scene would look like if she dared open her door. 

She didn’t open her door.

She laid back down, biting hard on her lip and drawing the covers up over her head, trying to focus on her breathing. 

But no matter how hard she willed it, Max couldn’t stop her own body from shaking beneath the blankets.

She never went back to sleep.

***

Billy didn’t speak to her that morning. Not at breakfast, and not in the car on the way to school. She wasn’t sure whether or not she should be relieved or afraid. She watched him from the corner of her eye as he sat in the driver’s seat of his camaro, hands clutched tightly around the wheel as he drove them to school. 

He didn’t look at her, but the expression on his face was stormy. His eyes were red-rimmed and she wondered if it was from lack of sleep or from crying. Her guess was both. 

When he shifted the car into park in the parking lot of the school, Max didn’t hesitate before bolting out of the passenger seat, not even waiting for him to turn the car off before making a beeline to the building. 

***

During fourth period there was an announcement about an assembly for the freshman and sophomores at Hawkins High. Max trudged to her locker before heading to the gym, stuffing her books inside her locker and rubbing the back of her neck wearily. She spotted Will just as he was heading inside and she hurried to catch up with him, linking her arm through his. He glanced over at her, smiling brightly and making her smile back despite her exhaustion and melancholy mood.

Out of everyone in the party, after Lucas, Max found herself spending more time with Will than the others. She felt safe at the Byers’ place, and she shared a sense of camaraderie with Will that she didn’t with Dustin or Mike or Jane. She didn’t know why or even how to explain how it had come to be, it just _was_. 

They headed up the bleachers together toward the rest of their friends, Max smoothing her skirt down self-consciously as they went. She sat down between Lucas and Will, nodding a greeting at the others. The assembly turned out to be a very dull presentation on the dangers of drugs and alcohol, and Max wound up dozing off with her head on Lucas’ shoulder, his arm wound around her waist. 

When it was over, he shook her gently and she lifted her head, squinting against the bright lights and rubbing her eyes. 

“Ugh, did I really sleep through that whole thing?” 

“You really did. Don’t worry, you only snored a couple times,” Dustin teased, leaning over to look at her. She stuck her tongue out at him and stretched, noting the worried look that Will was giving her. 

“I was up late studying, don’t give me that look,” she grumbled. 

“You need to get more sleep, Max,” he said, concern in his tone. 

If only her family would let her, she thought.

***

Will walked down the hallway alongside Mike and Dustin after lunch, heading toward their shared fifth period English class. He wasn’t really sure how they’d been lucky enough at the start of the year to share so many classes, but he was grateful for it, regardless. He just wished Lucas and Max and El were all in the class, too. But frankly it was high school and he knew the chances of all seven of them being in a class together had been slim to none from the get-go. 

“Okay, so Lucas’ birthday is next week,” Mike began as they walked through the throng of students. “The big one-five. We need to go all out this time.” 

“We gotta pull Max into the planning,” Dustin said with a nod, glancing over at the two of them. “She may already have ideas about what he’s hoping for.” 

“It’d be good if we could all pool our money and get him one awesome present of some kind, too,” Will said. 

“Yeah, I was thinking about that and what if --” Mike’s voice cut off as someone ran right into him, nearly knocking him over. 

“Shit! Mike, you okay?” Dustin reached out to try and steady him. 

“Watch where the fuck you’re going!” 

Will turned wide eyes up to look at Billy Hargrove, who was glaring at Mike so hard that if the look could have killed him, Mike would be a puddle on the floor. 

“You ran into me!” 

He loved Mike dearly, but sometimes his friend had very little in the way of survival skills. Instead of apologizing, his friend mouthed off to the bully who was a hell of a lot bigger, definitely stronger, and much scarier than Troy or James had ever been. 

“What’d you say to me?” Billy took a menacing step forward, hand shooting out and grabbing the collar of Mike’s shirt, spinning him and slamming him up against the row of lockers. The stream of students had thinned in the hallway but there were still enough around that stopped and turned to stare at them. 

“Let him go, asshole!” Dustin said angrily, fists clenching at his sides. “You remember the last time you messed with one of us?” 

Billy ignored him entirely, getting up in Mike’s face. “I oughta kill you right here as a warning to your other stupid friends.” 

Fear kept Will paralyzed in place, eyes wide as he watched the scene unfold in front of him. 

“Billy! Billy, let him go!” 

He wasn’t even sure where Max had come from, but she stormed through the crowd of students gathered around until she was right up front. She reached out and grabbed his arm. 

The look he had given Mike had been scary, but the one Will saw him give Max was downright terrifying. Murderous. 

“Let _go_ of him,” she urged. 

To Will’s amazement, Billy let Mike go, and Dustin pulled him away from the step siblings. For one long, tense moment, he was sure that Billy was going to hit her or throw _her_ up against the locker as he stared at her. Instead, he glowered and stomped off without looking back. 

Swallowing hard, Will moved to her side, watched the shock, and then the fear and then the uncertainty flicker over her features. “Are you _okay?_ ” He wasn’t even sure which of his friends he meant, and he looked back and forth between Mike and Max. 

“That was so _cool_ ,” Dustin told her with a grin. 

“Thanks,” Mike said awkwardly, straightening his shirt and still looking shaken by the entire thing.

“Yeah,” Max mumbled, pressing a hand to her stomach absently, turning to head to her own class but only making it a few steps before he caught up with her.

“Max!” Will caught her arm. “Are you all right?” 

“Never better,” she answered. But she didn’t meet his eyes. 

He stopped following her. For the first time in a long time, Will knew without a doubt that one of his closest friends had just lied to him.

***

Max had known she was in trouble the moment she’d grabbed Billy’s arm that afternoon and pulled him away from Mike. She didn’t know exactly what Billy was going to do to her this weekend, but she knew it was going to be bad. When she climbed into the camaro with him after school and he didn’t say a word, she knew she was right. However scary he might be when he was screaming in her face, the silence was somehow worse. 

Her stomach was in knots by the time they made it home from the ten minute drive. 

He climbed out of the car and left her sitting there without speaking, stalking up to the front door, unlocking it and disappearing inside. She forced herself to take a deep breath, contemplating the ramifications of taking off and just vanishing for the night. It would certainly be safer for her. 

But his whispered threats against Lucas every time he forced himself onto her and inside of her rang in her ears. As terrified as she was of him, she was more afraid he’d make good on one of those threats. She knew he was more than capable. Proved it over and over again and today’s incident with Mike had been a startling reminder of how easily he could fly into a rage over nothing. 

Max clutched onto her bookbag and slowly climbed out of the car, walking up toward the house, stepping inside and closing the front door as quietly as she could. His music was already blaring loudly enough that the walls were rattling. 

She slipped into her room and shut the door, turning the lock and dumping her bag onto the bed. Chewing her lower lip, she made her way to her closet and pulled it open, grabbing her overnight bag out and tossing it onto her bed, as well. She grabbed out a handful of shirts and jeans, some clean underwear and socks, stuffing them all into the bag. Just in case. She carefully placed the bag onto a shelf in her closet and closed the closet doors.

Knowing there was no way to get out of the house tonight without consequences she’d rather not think about, Max changed clothes, stripping off the skirt and tossing it into her hamper, replacing it with a pair of much more comfortable jeans, and then changing out of the sweater she had on to a t-shirt with her green hoodie over it. Then she settled down at her desk to start on some homework. 

***

The moment that the music was switched off, Max woke with a start, looking around her room but not seeing anything out of place. She flinched when she heard him pound on the door. 

“Unlock this fucking door, Max,” he said, voice calmer than she would have anticipated. Bad sign, she thought. 

She didn’t want to get up and open that door, but she knew she didn’t have another viable choice, so she slowly made her way to it and unlocked it, tugging it open. He stood there in a t-shirt and jeans, cigarette hanging from his lips. 

“Don’t ever lock this door again,” he warned with a raised eyebrow, and she felt her blood run cold. That door lock was the only thing that made her feel anything resembling safe in her room every night. Of course he would take that away too. “Follow me.” 

Max swallowed hard, expecting him to cross the hall into her room, but he didn’t. He walked toward the garage, waiting for her to catch up before pulling the door shut behind them. “Billy?” 

“What you did today was fucking stupid. You know that right? I could see it on your face that you knew you fucked up this afternoon.” He put a hand between her shoulder blades and guided her to the center of the garage. 

He was right. She’d known it the moment she’d intervened, but she couldn’t let him hurt Mike, either. There were never any good choices when Billy was involved. She didn’t try to pull away from him when he grabbed one of her wrists, tugging it up and above her head. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she looked up, stomach dropping when she spotted the restraints he’d strung from the rafters. He tied one of them tightly around her left hand, then did the same with her right one. They were up just high enough that she was forced to stand on her tiptoes or risk her arms getting pulled from the sockets. 

“Here’s the deal, Max. You gotta learn to keep your mouth shut. At school, at home. The sooner you learn it, the sooner your life’s going to get a whole lot easier.” He stroked a hand down her hair before moving away to the woodworking bench to the right. He picked up a switchblade and fear shot through her as he moved closer to her once more. 

“I could’ve been nice and not ruined your clothes, and I wouldn’t have if you hadn’t already changed back into your dumpster dyke look,” he told her. “But I figure these don’t matter anymore.” Billy slid the blade beneath the material of her shirt and hoodie and then yanked it down, shredding the material down the middle in one harsh tug. She felt the tip of the blade slide down her stomach and she held her breath, looking down to see if he’d cut her. He hadn’t. But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t. 

Billy cut through the sleeves of her clothes next, yanking them off her and letting them pool onto the concrete floor beneath her, leaving her in her bra and jeans. But not for long. He cut her jeans off her next, and this time she did feel the sting as he sliced through the blue jean material over her right hip. He smirked at her, putting the blade between his teeth and tugging the jeans off her entirely. 

There were goosebumps on her arms because it was January and cold. Too cold to be in a bra and underwear in the unheated garage, but she knew he didn’t give a shit about her comfort. He studied her intently for a few moments before moving away and setting the knife down on the bench. He picked up a thin strip of cloth. 

“So.” He moved behind her, covering her eyes with the cloth and tying it tightly behind her head. She couldn’t see anything. Not even the faintest hint of light. Her heart began to beat harder. He rested his chin on his shoulder. “This lesson is about learning to keep quiet. The more noise you make, the more things are going to hurt.” 

Max willed herself not to cry even though he wouldn’t be able to see her tears if she did. She felt him move around her, then away, returning a moment later and forcing her legs farther apart, securing them in place with - well. With what she didn’t know because she couldn’t see it. It felt like metal of some kind. Her arms were already beginning to ache with the strain of being stretched over her head. 

“So I’m not gonna gag you. And I’m not going to turn on any music. The louder you are, the harder on you I’m going to be.” She jumped a little when he smacked her ass but she managed to stay silent. 

“Good girl.” She could hear the amusement in her voice. “Let’s see how long you can keep that up. I’m betting it won’t be very long.” 

***

To his surprise and Max’s credit, the only sounds she made while he worked her over with the flogger were faint gasping noises. He didn’t make her count this time because frankly he didn’t plan on stopping at any specified number. He set the flogger on the bench, picking up the switchblade and moving over to her trembling body. He slid the blade beneath her bra straps, slicing them in half and then down the middle between the cups, watching them fall away and turning his attention to her bared breasts. 

He pressed the tip of the blade against her sternum. “You know, one good shove right here and you’d be done being a giant pain in my ass,” he murmured, trailing the knife over to her left nipple and circling it gently with the cool blade as she shuddered involuntarily. “Good thing for you I have other plans.” He slid the blade down her stomach, a tiny, thin trail of blood appearing at the shallow cut over her already reddened belly. He slid it farther down, cutting her underwear off and leaving her entirely bare and open to anything he wanted to do to her, thanks to the spreader bar he’d attached to her ankles. 

He set the knife down and reached out, tugging and tweaking her nipples until they were tiny peaked little buds and she was panting for breath. He _knew_ she enjoyed the pain. He lowered his head, suckling on one of her sensitive nipples and enjoying the faint whimper that escaped her. He moved away, picking up two medium sized binder clips off the bench before moving back to her side. 

“This is gonna sting a little.” He tugged her right nipple between his thumb and forefinger before snapping the clip over it tightly. She bucked in her restraints, the softest of cries escaping her. He’d punish her for that later. He grabbed hold of her left nipple and did the same thing, squeezing down on both of them and making her jerk back in an attempt to get away, which only made it worse as the metal clips dug into her sensitive skin. 

Billy licked his lips as he stared at her, shoulders shaking as she cried but tried not to make any noise. “How about a little break? I’m getting hungry.” He didn’t wait for her to respond as he turned and headed back to the door that led to the house, leaving her there strung up and naked.

***

Max didn’t know how much time passed between when he’d left her hanging in the garage bare and shivering from both the pain and the cold. The pain in her breasts had lasted only a couple of moments and as long as she stayed still, whatever he’d snapped onto them didn’t produce any sensation at all. The slightest movement, however, made them ache with tiny little sparks of pain. 

The rest of her body, however, ached horribly. Her arms were the worst of all, and her hands had gone numb from the tightness of the rope, and the odd position they were forced into when he’d tied her up. She’d tried counting the strikes at the beginning, but she’d lost track as he’d moved around her with the flogger, hitting her wherever the urge struck him. Most of it had been concentrated on her back, but he’d made sure not to miss out on whipping the front and back of her thighs. 

She knew it wasn’t over just because he’d left the garage for awhile. She did her best to focus on the fact that her mom and Neil would be back the following afternoon. That she’d be safe for at least 48 hours after that because Billy never messed with her when they were around. She tensed when she heard footsteps approaching moments later. 

“How ya feeling?” he asked idly from a few feet away. 

Max didn’t know what answer he wanted to hear, so she didn’t say anything at all. She drew in a slow, deep breath and exhaled just as slowly. She heard him chuckle as he got closer to her, pressing something cool and metallic up against her stomach. It felt mostly smooth, but there were a couple of little ridges, too. Her eyebrows furrowed behind the blindfold as she tried to figure out what he was holding. 

“Got a little more to go before we’re done tonight.” He moved away suddenly, the metallic object disappearing, as well. “You did pretty well with the flogger today. I’m actually impressed.” 

She could smell the smoke from his cigarette as he talked, and she willed him to just finish whatever he planned to do to her, and at the same time, she willed herself to remain as silent as she had so far. Dread coiled in her stomach when she felt the familiar leather of his belt traced lightly over her breasts. 

***

Billy blew smoke in her face even as he folded his belt in half, circling her body until he was behind her. Her back was covered in red welts, but they would fade within a couple of days. The marks from the flogger didn’t tend to last as long as they did with the belt or a paddle, and he definitely wanted her to remember tonight for awhile. 

Remind her to keep her fucking mouth shut. To not get in his way when he was pissed off.

He took a long drag off his cigarette before drawing back and letting the leather bite into her ass. She jerked violently in the restraints, but she made no sound. Shit. He was doing a better job training her than he’d thought. That was harder than he’d hit her all evening. 

He struck her again, the resounding _crack_ almost making him cringe if only because he knew exactly how much it stung. At least this time he wasn’t the one on the receiving end of the belt. Her ass was bright red after several more well-placed swats. Enough that he knew she’d be bruised by morning, that they would _last_ at least a few days. 

Billy took another puff off his cigarette and moved to stand in front of her. Her breathing was more shallow, her chest shaking as she cried, but he had to give her props for doing it silently. He lowered the belt and reached out with his free hand, tugging the binder clips off her nipples quickly. 

A pained cry escaped her this time and she drew in a shuddering breath. He shook his head a little, dropping the clips to the floor and reaching out, twisting her right nipple just a little as she whimpered. “These are gonna be sore for awhile,” he commented, rubbing the leather over the other one before giving it a short, light slap with the belt and making her gasp. 

“Just one more thing,” he murmured, leaning in and pressing his lips to hers in a kiss before pulling away to head back to the workbench. He set the belt down and picked up the gun before moving back to her. “Open your mouth, Max.” 

She hesitated only a moment before obeying and he grinned, sliding the barrel of the .45 into her mouth and letting it rest on her tongue. 

“Suck,” he ordered, watching intently as her lips closed around it. He reached up with his free hand, tugging the blindfold off and watching the shock flicker over her face at the realization of what he’d put in her mouth, and enjoying the panicked expression that followed almost immediately. He pumped it in and out of her mouth a few times, keeping his gaze locked on hers. Her blue eyes were wide with fear. Tears spilled down her cheeks and he leaned in, kissing one of them away. 

“It’d be so easy to pull this trigger, Max,” he murmured. “But you’re just too damn much fun to mess with.” He pulled the gun out of her mouth and held it up in front of her face so she could take a good look at it. “I got a bullet with Lucas’ name on it in my closet. Don’t make me use it.” 

***

There was a gun in her mouth. 

Billy somehow had a _gun_. 

The terror she’d managed to push away returned full force as he stared at her, making her suck on the cold metallic barrel of the handgun. There was a dark look in his eyes even as he leaned in and kissed her cheek before removing the weapon from between her lips. Her stomach twisted and she struggled not to throw up as he threatened Lucas. 

Billy without a deadly weapon was dangerous. With one, she had _zero_ doubt he’d use it if she pushed him at all. 

“I won’t,” she whispered, voice choked. “I won’t make you use it, Billy, please. I’ll do whatever you want.” 

He cocked his head to the side, stroking the tip of the gun down over her chest, letting it brush over one of her nipples. “Anything?” he echoed. 

“Anything. Just - don’t hurt anyone else. You can do whatever you want to me, I won’t fight you.” 

He searched her eyes and a smirk slid across his face. “Yeah. That’s better.” He moved away from her, laying the gun down on the bench and then returning to her side, undoing the spreader bar that was keeping her legs stretched apart. Then he stood and reached up, untying her wrists. She dropped and would’ve hit the concrete floor if he hadn’t caught her. She was surprised he bothered. 

All the feeling in her hands started to rush back and they ached as she did her best not to make any noise, not to complain. 

“Let’s get you into bed, Maxine.” 

She closed her eyes at that, knowing the night still wasn’t over. He was going to fuck her before he left her alone. She knew him too well by now. But she didn’t argue. She couldn’t. She let him half carry, half drag her into the house and push her onto the bed. Pain swept over her at the impact of her bruised skin hitting the mattress, rubbing against the sheets and blankets. 

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Gonna clean up the mess you made, then I’ll be back.” Billy squeezed her arm and vanished. 

Max willed herself to pass out, to just be unconscious when he came back. He’d do what he wanted whether she was awake for it or not. If she was passed out then maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much. 

***

“Are you all right?” 

Max turned at the sound of her mother’s voice the next evening to find her standing behind her in the kitchen as she made herself a bowl of soup for dinner. “Yeah, I’m okay,” she lied, realizing how easy it was getting to lie to people. To _everyone._ It was becoming easier because it _had_ to be. 

Susan studied her intently. “You seem like you’re tired.” 

“I’ve been up late studying a lot,” she answered with a shrug. Truthfully she couldn’t remember the last time she’d studied. Her grades were slipping if the C- on the last history test was anything to go by. She knew she was going to have to pull it together or she’d be in even more trouble than she already was. Only this time it would be with her stepdad, too.

“Well. Billy’s going out to a party tonight and I’m sure he won’t be back until sometime early in the morning. Why don’t you make plans with one of your new friends?” 

Max paused at that. “Like a sleepover?” 

“Yes. That sounds like just what you need,” she agreed with a smile. 

“I guess I could see if my friend Jane is up for company tonight.” 

“That sounds lovely.” Susan pressed a kiss to her forehead before ducking out of the room. Max watched her go, eyes darting to the phone briefly before dismissing the idea of calling anyone. There was really only one place she truly wanted to go. 

One person she wanted to see. 

***

It wasn’t uncommon for Max to slide in through his window at night. Sometimes things at her house were too crazy, too intense, too _terrible._ Lucas had taken to leaving the window unlocked for her, so even if he was asleep she had a way in. He slept with his door locked these days, just to prevent his parents or Erica from walking in and finding her curled up asleep with him in the bed. It was all totally innocent. Well. Mostly. Things had been getting a little more intense between them in the last few months but things seemed to have changed a few weeks ago. He’d been worried about her, and she seemed to be shutting him out. Shutting _everyone_ out. 

He was almost surprised when she slipped through the window that night. He wasn’t asleep - he was sitting at his desk finishing up his calculus homework for Monday, and when he heard the window slide open, he turned to see her. 

Her hair was dripping wet from the rain he hadn’t even realized had been falling, and she was already shedding the lightweight jacket she was wearing, hanging it up on his closet door knob. “Hey,” he greeted her with a warm smile. 

“Hey.” She brushed the hair back and out of her face and his expression grew troubled when he saw how pale she is, how dark the circles under her eyes have gotten. “Your parents’ car isn’t in the driveway.” 

“Yeah - they went to visit my uncle in Chicago for the weekend,” Lucas told her. 

Max ran her fingers over his sweater that’s draped over the edge of his bed. “And Erica?” 

“She went with. I got a pass because of all the homework.” He gestured to the stack of books on his desk. He’d also never leave town without telling her first, but he’d still leave his window unlocked in case she needed a safe place to be. “But I definitely need a break.” Especially if it was a Max-shaped break. Those were his favorite kind. He smiled up at her and watched as she sat down on the edge of his bed. 

She nodded, looking back at him and not for the first time recently, he can’t read her expression. “So...we’re alone then.” 

For the first time ever, really. 

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, I guess we are.” He wasn’t sure why he suddenly felt a little nervous. This was the kind of situation that guys would give their right arm up for. There was a tiny smile on her face that wasn’t entirely playful or teasing and he set his pencil down. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Her response was immediate and he knew that something was up with her, but he also knew her well enough to know she wouldn’t tell him what it was until she was ready. And he knew better than to try and push her. “Okay, that’s good.” 

She hummed quietly, toying with the zipper of her hoodie. “Your birthday’s this week.” 

Lucas blinked a couple of times, then nodded. “Yeah. Yeah. The big one five,” he joked. 

Max was silent for a moment, contemplative expression on her face. “How do you feel about an early birthday present?” 

He arched his eyebrows, grin spreading across his face even though he hadn’t seen her carry anything in with her. “Really?”

“Really.” She rose to her feet and moved toward him, his eyes growing wider when she straddled his lap. His hands moved to grip onto her hips to make sure she didn’t end up tumbling backwards and he closed his eyes when she leaned in and pressed her mouth against his.

A soft sigh escaped him when she kissed her way down his neck, and he reached up with one hand, sliding it into her hair. He started slightly when one of her hands slid down his torso and she undid the button on his jeans. “Whoa. Max, what -” 

“Shh.” Max gave him a look, pressing a kiss to his lips and then sliding off his lap and kneeling in front of him, drawing the zipper down on his jeans. Oh Jesus. He wondered distantly if this was really a thing that was happening, or if he’d fallen asleep and started having the most amazing dream ever. He held his breath as he watched her. After a second she hesitated, gaze flicking up to him. “Is this okay?” 

He blew out a breath, nodding immediately. “Yeah. I mean, yeah if you _want_ to.” Her lips curved upwards a little and she reached up, resting her hands on the waistband of his jeans. 

“Lift up,” she told him. 

Swallowing heavily, he lifted his hips and she tugged his jeans down his hips, letting them drop around his knees, along with his boxers. His cheeks burned as she glanced up at him again, giving him a smile that made him want to kiss her. But when one of her hands wrapped around his length, he inhaled sharply, closing his eyes. 

“Tell me if you want me to stop,” she said, voice quiet, pumping her hand up and down his shaft.

Her tongue flicked over the head of his cock, and she laved the length of it, getting it wet. “Oh my god.” And then she took him in her mouth, and he gripped onto the armrests of his chair, digging his nails in, trying not to buck upwards and choke her. His heart was thundering in his chest at the pleasant sensations she was creating. Her mouth was hot and wet and he was pretty sure there was nothing in the world that could possibly feel this incredible. 

Max lifted her other hand to rest gently on his hip and something about the tenderness made him open his eyes to look at her. The sight of her with his length in her mouth, focused expression on her face as she pumped the rest of his dick with her hand was stunning. 

“You’re beautiful,” he whispered, and her gaze darted up to look at him and she rolled her eyes. “I’m serious.” He reached out with one hand, fingers brushing over her head and she flinched back, pulling off him and his eyes widened. “Sorry.” 

She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and shook her head. “It’s fine. You just startled me. Go ahead.” She shifted closer once more, drawing him back into her mouth as he hesitantly reached out and rested a hand on the back of her head. He didn’t put any pressure there, he just wanted to touch her. His fingers carded through her hair and he smiled a little when she glanced up at him, a momentarily confused expression on her face that he didn’t understand. But it seemed to relax her and he blew out a breath, letting his eyes drift shut once more.

It took all of his self-restraint not to move his hips from the chair as she hollowed out her cheeks, one hand reaching up to gently squeeze at his balls firmly but gently. “Holy shit. Oh god, Max,” he moaned, head dropping backwards onto the chair. 

It didn’t take her long to work him him up to a peak and he gasped. “Max, I’m gonna --” 

She looked up at him, but didn’t pull away the way he’d expected her to with the warning. Instead, she sucked him farther into her mouth, eyes watering, and he felt her throat constrict around him as she swallowed. His heart lurched but he couldn’t hold back as his orgasm hit suddenly, like a freight train and he shuddered, moaning her name again. He stared at her, breathless and wide eyed as she pulled off him with a wet _pop_ , swallowing again heavily. 

“Jesus,” he whispered, boneless. Tears were streaming down her red face and alarm shot through him, making him sit up straight. “Max, are you okay? Did I hurt you?” 

She coughed a couple of times, shaking her head and wiping her hands over her face self-consciously. “No. It’s normal. Gag reflex,” she answered, voice raspier than usual and he winced. He watched her stand up and he did the same, slowly tugging his boxers and jeans back up. 

“I’ll get you some water,” he told her, reaching out and cupping her cheek in his hand momentarily before pulling away and heading out of the room. He returned a couple minutes later, carrying the glass and pausing when he found her lounging on his bed. All the air left his lungs as his gaze lingered on her long, slender legs, disappearing beneath one of his own oversized button down shirts, her own shirt and hoodie folded up neatly and placed on his desk with her bra and jeans.

Jesus.

He slowly moved the bedside, holding out the water glass and sitting down on the edge of the bed, watching as she took a few slow sips before setting it on his bedside stable. “Can you stay tonight?” His voice was hushed. 

“Yeah. I was planning on it.” Her voice was light and he couldn’t help but grin. 

“Good. I’m just -- gonna change clothes.” 

“You don’t just sleep in your boxers?” 

“Yeah, but - are you comfortable with that?” 

Max rolled her eyes at him. “Lucas, I just gave you a blowjob. Get comfortable.” 

Lucas chuckled nervously, nodding and hesitating before stripping out of all his clothes but his boxers, folding them neatly and placing them next to hers before crawling onto the bed beside her. His eyes softened as he gazed at her, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss against her mouth.

She reached out, resting her hands on his hips and tugging him gently down onto the bed with her so they were lying face to face. He reached up with one hand, resting it on her cheek and stroking her skin gently with his thumb, brushing it under her eyes were a couple of tears still lingered. 

“You’re amazing,” he murmured, resting his forehead against hers. She didn’t answer, and he was silent for a moment before stroking his hand down the side of her body, over her gentle curves, letting it come to rest on her hip. “Can I...do something for you? Like you did for me?” He was a little startled when the words made her tense beside him but she shook her head. 

“No. I wanted to do that for you. I don’t need anything in return,” she told him and he shifted down a little so he could meet her eyes. 

“I know, but...what if I want to?” 

She shifted a little closer to him, closing her eyes. “Maybe you could just - hold me?” Her voice was quiet, vulnerable, and Lucas felt the concern he’d been having for her the last few weeks returning full-force. Instantly he shifted closer to her, draping his arm around her waist. 

“Yeah, of course,” he murmured. She moved again, resting her head against his chest, over his heart and he moved his free hand to stroke her hair without thinking about it. It just felt like the thing to do. “Max?” 

“Hm?” He couldn’t tell if she was on the verge of falling asleep or not. 

“Are you okay?” 

There was a long pause. Too long of a pause. “Do you ever thinking about leaving?” Her voice was distant, like she was only with him physically and her mind was somewhere else.

Lucas frowned. “Like...getting out of Hawkins?” he asked, looking down at her. All he could really see was the top of her head.

“Yeah.” 

“Sure. All the time,” he admitted. “I mean...it’s Hawkins. I don’t wanna be here forever.” He was quiet for a moment. “But…” 

“But you’d miss your family and friends,” she murmured, and he wasn’t sure why there was suddenly so much dread in the pit of his stomach. 

“Yeah,” he said just as quietly, resting his chin atop her head. “But one day I’m going anyway. I mean the college here is okay but...I don’t wanna stay here for college either.” It was such a long time away that it was almost weird to be thinking about, to be talking about so seriously. But he knew Max didn’t have the same sentimental feelings for this town as he did. More than that, he knew her family situation was a lot different from his own and not in a good way. 

“Where will you go?” 

“I don’t know, really. Maybe Stanford.” 

At that, Max lifted her head and looked up at him. “California?” 

“Well, yeah. I mean, that’s what you’re planning right? To go back home?” he asked, searching her eyes. 

Her gaze dropped and she slowly laid her head back down against his chest. “It’s a long time from now.” 

“What made you bring this up?” he asked, unable to shake his unease. 

“I don’t know. I was just...thinking, I guess.” 

“About getting out of Hawkins?” His voice held no judgement. He couldn’t and didn’t blame her for it. He knew as well as any of them how shitty her brother was, and from the bits and pieces she’d confided about her stepdad, he wasn’t really any better. He also knew how much Max missed her dad. 

“Just...about the future,” she whispered. 

He wasn’t sure what made him do it, but he tightened his arms around her just a bit, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Rough week at home.” It wasn’t even a question. He knew her well enough at this point.

“Yeah.” He felt her breathing hitch and his heart stuttered. 

“Max...you know you can come here _anytime_ right? Day or night? Even if I’m not here,” he whispered. 

“I’m okay. Just...there’s been a lot of screaming in the middle of the night lately.” Lucas rested one hand on the back of her head. “I haven’t been sleeping well.”  


“Well. I can promise you that that’s not going to be a thing that happens tonight. Just try and get some rest. I’ve got you,” he murmured. “Okay?” 

She nodded against him, falling silent. Within moments, Max had fallen asleep in his arms. Lucas stayed awake, troubled, but keeping watch into the early morning hours.

***

Max wasn’t sure how long she’d slept when she finally woke hours later. At some point during the night, she’d shifted onto her side, facing away from Lucas, but he’d turned with her, arm draped protectively around her waist, their fingers interlaced. She drew in a slow breath and exhaled, letting her eyes drift shut again. 

She also wasn’t sure what had come over her the night before. It wasn’t like she’d planned to sneak into his room with the idea to give him an early birthday blowjob. She’d just planned to sneak into his room and spend the night there with him, talking and trying to relax after a few terrible weeks at home. 

But the idea had popped into her head as she sat on the edge of his bed and it had dawned on her. Billy may have forced her to do whatever he wanted, whenever _he_ wanted, but _she_ wanted to give that to Lucas. She wanted to make him feel good, wanted to be closer to him.

She loved him. 

Her chest tightened painfully at the realization. It wasn’t like she hadn’t known that for awhile, but she hadn’t _acknowledged_ the truth of it. 

She’d been so damn dangerously close to spilling everything to him the previous night. She’d thought of that bag in her closet, and she knew she couldn’t leave on the chance that Billy would take it out on Lucas. He certainly would. And he had the means to do it. 

She’d almost asked him to leave with her. 

Max couldn’t do that to him. He had a family that loved him. Friends that would be devastated if he left. She couldn’t ask him to give up his entire life for _her_. She wasn’t worth that and she knew it. And she thought that if she _did_ ask him, there was a chance he’d actually agree to it, and then what? That was where her master plan ended. 

There was no way out of the web she was caught up in. 

She was trapped. 

This would have to be enough to get her through. These stolen moments with him. It was all she would be able to hold onto while she waited out the rest of the school year. Billy would be graduating in a few months, and whether he wanted to stick around to continue making her life hell or not, she was pretty sure Neil would be kicking him out as soon as he finished school. 

She could get through the hell that had become her life if it was only for a few more months. She could handle it. 

Because there weren’t any other options left.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback fuels my writing, apparently, so thank you to all those who have commented on this dark little series of mine.


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